I Gotta Stop Standing in My Own Way

So here’s the tea: God recently opened my eyes to just how much I’ve been standing in the way of my future by not focusing on the things He’s called me to in this moment. I’ve been getting in my own way. You ever been running at a decent pace and another runner in front of you on the track is going at a slower pace? or someone is tying their shoe just ahead of you? That’s how I imagine my life has been. I’ve been running at a decent pace and BOOM for the past couple of months, I’ve been stopping myself from getting to the finish line.

With full confidence, I can say that I have been allowing the enemy to use the desires of my heart to distract me from what God has been urging me to do in the right now. I allowed what I want for my future and what I know God will eventually allow me to have to distract me from what I should’ve been doing in my present life.

Don’t get me wrong, the enemy isn’t all knowing like Christ so he can’t know what’s in our hearts on his own accord but the minute we speak out of our mouths what we desire, the enemy has the opportunity to take it and try to see how he can use that against us.

For some time now as I’ve prepared for graduation and transitioning out of college, my mind has been on a few different things – possibly moving away Hattiesburg, how I’m going to use my degree after graduation, getting married, having kids one day, and pursuing the visions and goals in my head that God has given me. For some reason though, marriage became the most pressing thing. Not because I desire to be married prematurely but because that is ALL. I. SEE. In a world where everyone around you is getting engaged and married, you follow wedding pages on Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram, and you find yourself in a long-term relationship, you would think that’s your next step too! Once I expressed out of my mouth my desire to be married, the thought of it clouded my mind like none other. I was seeing it everywhere. People came out of the woodworks asking when I was getting engaged, married, etc. Everywhere I turned, there was a reminder of what I desired. It’s like I just KNEW that’s what I was supposed to do next. I didn’t see it as a problem then but now I see how the enemy used my desire and my timeline to distract me. It’s like all the things God had laid on my heart prior took a backseat to what my timeline of my life looked like.

This marriage thing. That thing will get ya every time. If you desire to be married, I urge you to leave it at that – a desire. Even if you are in a relationship, marriage should just not be on your radar until God says so. I urge you to ask God what it is that He desires for you to put your focus on in this present moment. Marriage as an idea definitely became a distraction for me and got even worse once me and Jeremiah actually started talking about when we desired to be married. If you know us, y’all already know we had two TOTALLY different ideas about this. This discussion was one we were having frequently, arguing over, and point blank on the verge of breaking up over. It got so bad that late one night I was crying in my car and I yelled to God,”I’M NOT EVEN GOING TO BE CONCERNED WITH MARRIAGE ANYMORE. I DON’T CARE.” And it’s almost as if God was like “Good!”. I felt so much peace in that moment when I declared to God that I was going to shift my focus. It was like this whole time that’s exactly what He was trying to get me to do.

God begin to show me how the idea of marriage being one of my next steps was stopping me from seeing what He wanted to do with me RIGHT NOW. Immediately when I shifted my focus from what I wanted, God began to move in my life. My passions and purpose came racing back to the forefront of my mind, ideas and goals that were lying dormant in my mind came forward, and I began acting on what God wanted from me RIGHT NOW!

It doesn’t have to marriage though. What distracts you from doing what God desires for you to do in your present life probably isn’t the same as what distracts me. Is it being in a relationship? A career goal God hasn’t called you to? Is it feelings of loneliness, depression? Is it money issues? Are you working a job that you don’t love and it’s distracting you from doing God’s work? Whatever it is, if there is something, I’m here to tell you that it ain’t worth it. We really have to stop getting in our own way and let God lead us where He wants us in His timing. The power, passion, and purpose that I’ve been feeling these days is unmatched and unexplainable, and all I had to do was take my focus off of the future and focus on the now. I’m not saying my desire to be married is wrong or that even the desire to be married sooner than later is wrong, but what I do know is that it’s not time. I do know that God is a leader, MY leader, and it is my duty to follow Him.

Sooooo, remember these things:

  1. God is THE leader. So allow Him to lead you. Even if your desires are things He has called you to, make sure you are in line with His timing. God will never give you a promise prematurely or when you are not ready for it. He is definitely your best option as it relates to following someone. He will never lead you astray or fail you.
  2. Get out of your own way. A lot of times we blame other people or our circumstances for where we are in life but……… really though? Sometimes, we really are the only thing standing in the way of our own future. We may be distracted or moving ahead of God or just simply not feeling God’s plan at certain points but when we take our own desires and plans out of the picture, the real issue becomes more clear. In my case, I was the problem.
  3. God is good, so good things will happen. We can trust the character of God. We know His track record. We know that everything that comes from Him is good so if He’s making you wait for something or isn’t doing something in your life, you may not understand it completely but you do understand that He is good. So trust God’s goodness and trust His character. I know I want to be married, I know it’s God’s will for me to be married, and I know marriage is good. Because I know all of these things, I know that His timing is good. His plans for me are good.

It doesn’t really help that I work across the street from a wedding dress shop, but I mean… I can wait for all that if it means God’s plans and vision for my life can happen as they should. You should begin to shift your thoughts and develop this same mindset if you haven’t already.

As always love God, love people, and never stand in the way of your purpose because of your own desires. Get out of your own way.

If you have any questions about my walk with Christ, my blogs, or my life, feel free to email me at “sincerelyimani1997@gmail.com”! Follow me on social media to keep up with my blog through that avenue! Insta: _sincerelyimani and Facebook: Sincerely Imani 🙂

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