Purpose in My Process

“God, please hear my call. I am afraid for me. Love has burned me wrong. I need your healing please.” – Jill Scott

I’ve found myself in a place of loneliness for the past four months. I found that people only wanted me when they needed something. I had people calling and texting me more than ever before only when they required something of me whether that was advice, editing something, or company. I was afraid that I was stuck in a place that I didn’t want for myself. I had been “burned” wrong by love, and I was tired. I was crying out to God to send me help and to send me a friend. I was finding myself spending more time alone with myself, more than ever before. Time that I could’ve been spending with God as well, but I was too busy feeling sorry for myself to do so. I was too busy being hurt and not feeling like I had any friends to see purpose in my process. I kept getting talked about for no reason, finding myself under heavy criticism and scrutiny, and my character was always being attacked by people. I was hurting, and nobody knew it but me and God. I felt like I was in a really bad spot when in actuality I was just where God needed me to be.

A few weeks ago, God sent a word from heaven just for me and I will always remember it. This message put my life into perspective. It made me comfortable with the place I’m in, but reminded me that this isn’t the end for me. It reminded me that God promises us things and those promises will manifest in due time, but we have to go through the process first.Where I thought I was in a desert, begging for someone to bring me water and to sit with me in my mess… God revealed to me that I was and still am just in a dry season. And when you’re in a dry season, He will remove people from your life. He made my circle smaller, so that I can put more time and attention into growing up and giving Him the attention that He needs from me.

The message was centered around David and how he was chosen by God. David was anointed and called by God. He served God with his life and I’m sure it felt like nobody noticed the things he did for people or the sacrifices he made to serve other people. David’s time of public appearance came faster than he was prepared for. David was needed because Goliath was challenging the people of God, and David was the only one who could kill him. The message also showed how David longed to be mentored and loved by Saul (the king), but Saul was jealous of David and tried to kill him. David loved Saul, but he couldn’t help that God’s anointing was on his life and not Saul’s. David is an example of how people will sense the anointing on your life, and they will try to kill you whether that’s murdering you mentally, physically, spiritually, or socially. People will murder you, your character, and your self esteem with words when they’re jealous of you or can sense your anointing. You can walk into a room and people will hate you, simply because you are anointed by God.

God revealed to me how I was experiencing situations much like David did. He showed me how I was going through all of this persecution and loneliness because of the call on my life. God revealed to me that there are some Goliaths that are challenging the people of God, and I am the only one who can kill some specific Goliaths. The same goes for all who are called by God. We have to grow, and go through our personal processes in order to complete the assignments God has set before us. We have to look past the world and the attacks of the enemy. We can’t be detoured or distracted, because people are waiting on us. Somebody out there needs you to get through your dry season, so you can help them get through theirs. Somebody needs you to kill some of the Goliaths in their life and in this world. So fight. Fight for God, yourself, and for your God-given assignments. Fight through the dry season, so that God can rain on your life.

“They that will live godly, shall suffer prosecution.”

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